St George- Sand and Water

 

The first day we were there, we had awesome waves.  Brianna and Hadley are both captivated by Soul Surfer right now so they loved riding boogie boards.  I was once told I would “sissify” my kids so I work very hard at making sure they do not share their mothers assorted fears.  Go big or go home.  The funny side to this is that one side of the family finds me overly cautious and the “safety queen.”  The other finds me encouraging danger and less than watchful.  One more to the list of I can’t win.  Anyways, all 4 kids had a great time.

Lucy loves to be thrown in the air and splash back down into the water.

That’s some serious height.  I admit to catching my breath on a few of these.

Jack is becoming a fish like his sisters.  Aunt Karen suggested Hadley and Lucy may have gills.

Cousin R had major construction projects to create dams and canals.  Jack was no near as focused or organized.  Jack is more of a chase down the seagulls, eat a rice crispy treat while surfing kind of guy.  Jack carries around “little men", the assorted super heroes from his play sets of batman etc.  He insisted on burying them in the sand and then thinking Mama could just keep digging until I found them.  Brian said he was like a dog with a bone as despite my constant irritation with him for hiding the little men, he always seemed to find them.

 

Brianna is my nature lover.  She can spot crabs from miles away.  We had several that lived right outside the door or in this case, on the door.

My social butterfly (Hadley) knew every kid and family on the beach.

Lucy loved the beach and playing in the water, but we could not stop the eating of sand.  A lot of sand. 

Plenty of Daddy time was without a doubt the highlight of Lucy’s trip.  She is always happiest when we are all together.  Lucy reminds us what a blessing family is.  While exhausting, walking the beach with Lucy and Brianna while usually quiet Brianna talks non stop, and Lucy squeals to put her feet in the water is simply wonderful.

Total Cheer at the Beach

 

  

Hadley loves to dress she and Lucy alike.  Lucy loves cheer.  Most loud, chaotic places make her crazy, but Lucy loves cheer competitions.  Hadley is trying to teach her to fly and makes Jack the back spot.  It is very impressive to watch how hard a child that can’t stand independently will work to do a high V.  HW + D = WT  Hard work plus determination equals winning tradition.

St George 2011

 

When you become “ancient” (Brianna’s word for her elderly parents), you appreciate the value of a floppy hat.  Brian’s word was “classy”.  I think I like his view of me better.

All the fun details to follow.  Clear water, ocean breeze, dolphins just a few yards away and crabs galore.  I love vacation.  I am going for 2 weeks or even a month just as soon as possible. It may be a few decades but a girls gotta dream. ; )

Just Pool It

 

Oh how much difference a year makes.  I can now easily handle 4 at the pool.  Everybody carries something.  Big kids can manage themselves.  Jack is close to swimming without his life jacket all the time and Lucy swims.  That’s right!!  She puts her head in, blows bubbles, kicks and rolls for more oxygen.  It is interesting to see how many people know Lucy.  She of course doesn’t tell me names,but they sure recognize her.  With the move to public, Jack and Hadley both have more buddies to play with and Brianna spends most of her time reading and sunning.  It’s been a great time for all.  The addition of life guards that smile hasn’t hurt either.

Hadley tumbles as much as she swims.  How many of you can do handstand push ups?  Didn’t think so.

Jack is in a serious posing stage.  What in the world is he showcasing??  Lucy is on the swim ten, eat ten plan.  Thank goodness for school lunches at the pool!

Birds of a Feather

 

I failed to get good pictures of the girls’ pink and purple highlights we allowed for fall break, but I got my act together this time.  we made a special trip to BG to have them for vacation.  Lucy cried when she didn’t get one.

Red and zebra for Had.  She claims to dislike her coach O’Shea, but could not wait for him to see her feathers.  What a nut!

Purple for Brianna.  I guess as long as they aren’t bird brains, a few feathers won’t hurt.

Perfect Storm

Every summer we have the makings of a perfect storm, and much like those poor souls in the movie, we see it coming and are powerless to stop the drowning that follows.  It begins like this.....  We live with no margin.  You know, margin. The space around your paper so that when as a kid you had to write a really big word like photosynthesis or ethnocentric, it didn't run completely off the page.  You know, margin.  The areas we leave along roads so if you have to swerve you don't immediately topple off the hillside.  You know,margin.  The space we should leave in our lives so when a child is up all night sick, or a friend invites you to lunch, or work is a little more demanding, you don't completely fall apart.  We have no margin.  We fill each day to the max and then some.  Then summer begins to show on the horizon.  Just seeing it come closer on the pages of the calendar sends us rushing to sign up for additional sports.  Spring/summer sports seasons always coincide with the end of the year activities like parties, and field trips and science fairs.  The air warms and we race to get in garden.  An activity we both love and hate as it takes considerable time and effort both in the field and the kitchen as the harvest begins.  The few free Saturdays that exist we feel guilted into getting to the lake.  Pack up, load up, sunscreen etc.  Imagine packing for vacation each and every time you go.  This has led to this summer where the lack of margin finally shoved the lake out almost completely.  We have not been since May and not made either of our weekends for the lake house.  Frustration!!!  School lets out so everyone is home.  No preschool or play dates etc.  Just the four kids and me with all The assorted demands to be entertained, fed three or more times a day, and all day mess making.  I carry Lucy way too much and for the second summer in a row develop serious pain.  I mean high end painkillers kind of pain.  I mean can a deacon's wife drink bourbon if it's for medicinal purposes pain. (I know,carry her less.  Someday I won't be able to, but until then I plan on helping her slide and jump and swim and everything else.  She is worth it.)
 And then the church summer hits.  Four weeks, usually back to back, of camp,VBS, cottage prayer meetings and revival.  Four good weeks.  Sometimes even great weeks, but exhausting is hardly the word.  Add a few travel days from Brian and even before it begins I am screaming "MERCY!"  I watch it coming.  I know when it is over or even just part way through, I will have had it.  My blood pressure will be up.  My pain will be up.  I will be threatening, as I did yesterday, to take a job as a hotel maid where I will at least be paid to do 20 loads of laundry in a week.  Brian and I will be struggling to have a conversation beyond pick up times and how much supper cost.  Three of the four kids will be mad at me, and one will say as we try to pick up supper while another is at cheer so we can eat before revival, "I want a new Mommy and Daddy.  Mine are too mean."  AHHHHHH!!!
There are rainbows after storms.... right?

Jackisms

Jack never stops talking.  He never stops talking, never stops moving, and requires very little sleep to keep it all going. He has been heard more than once to scream in the car because "we won't let him talk!"  Don't be confused,he is welcome to join the conversation, but what he really wants is an opportunity to monologue.  Jack is also the foremost authority on anything and if you don't agree with him, he is sure it is simply because he hasn't said it loud enough.  Jack gives driving directions all the time.  The fact that he doesn't drive, can't read and doesn't know is irrelevant. Jack likes to be in charge and he has to know what is going on.  An answer of "I don't know." will bring him to his knees as he is convinced we are conspiring to keep him in the dark.  He is still at an age that can only imagine the world he himself has witnessed and experienced.  Everything else is the stuff of fairy tales.

Recent discussions I want to be sure I remember when I am ancient include.....  We have booked a Disney Cruise for next spring.  Jack was sharing in the car one day how much he wanted to go back to Disney World.  Brianna in a somewhat rare moment of sisterly love started telling Jack how much he would love the Disney boat.  Jack began to fall apart.  "We will have no place to sleep.  we can't take food for everyone.  Mickey's head will not fit in the boat!"  No amount of discussion could convince him this boat was bigger than our ski boat.  I guess he'll just have to wait and see.

A girl at the pool busted her nose and there was lots of blood but "The ambulance came and wiped her up."  The pool has been the location of several stories this summer.  Most have to do with Jack and a little friend from Lucy's class.  One day I heard him yelling "watch me"  I turned and called back "I'm watching" "Not you Mama, her."  This as he points out the cute girl in the butterfly swimsuit.  This same girl is 5 going on 20 and is just as sure she is right as Jack.  One day we were watching clouds roll in as we played in the pool and she decided the time had come for the lifeguards to blow their whistles and get everyone out.  She discussed it with Jack whom of course disagreed and then headed to the lifeguard stand to be a voice of storm warning.  Jack followed screaming at her. 

Sunday, Jack was told to stop helping the dog chew.  He was in his sister's rooms and when they yelled to get out, responded "I'm not even naked!"  And finally he came to tell us he thought Lucy had played in poop because "I smelled her door."  I really never know what this child will do next.  At least it will be loud so I can keep up with him.  As Brian said the other night as Jack was beating us to a pulp in his sleep after he joined us during a storm. "God bless his future wife."  Amen.

No More Bad Moms

One of my guilty pleasures is haunting the disboards late at night.  The disboards are an online discussion group of all things Disney.  Everything from room discounts to the best place to stay before a cruise can be found here.  I find the practice of flaming particularly interesting.  Flaming is slicing down a fellow disboarder for some perceived difference of opinion; often things as innocuous as the value of an over the door shoe organizer for storing trinkets in your hotel room, or the appropriateness of crocs for children's footwear.  From an online reading point of view this can be mildly humorous, but really it is just a small version of what I witness many times a week in the "real world".
I was a college student at the height of the Mommy Wars.  The eighties had preached the virtue of having it all and assured us moms could both break the glass ceiling of business and raise great kids. "We could bring home the bacon and fry it up in a pan". The daughters of that church found maybe that wasn't really the case.  As we floundered to discover what our own futures would look like it often became an all out battle between working and stay at home moms.  It was late night fodder in sorority house hallways and senior seminars alike.  Talk shows, books and magazines kept the skirmishes going.  We may have proclaimed our position proudly,but underneath, most women I know were constantly second guessing choices and always feeling like they had short changed someone.  Self heaped guilt was plentiful.  At the end of the day,few people felt like "good moms."
As I have aged, the Mommy Wars over work and home seem to have calmed.  I know a few women that are truly work over family dedicated.  I know a few very traditional stay at home moms, but most fall somewhere in between.  I have lots of friends and acquaintances that work part time or job share.  Plenty of people that took jobs with hours that fit their kids schedules or agree to work different shifts from their husbands so childcare is not an issue.  Lots of families with grandparents involved to make it all run smoothly.  It would seem that should be enough.  It isn't.  Maybe women are just destined to second guess ourselves, but instead of dealing with our own feelings of guilt, we seem to have decided as a gender to "flame" those around us.  Yes, we as women are busy burning down the people around us.  Don't get me wrong, there really are some bad parents in the world.  Heaven knows I watch kids walk into church every week whose parents don't know or care where they are.  I see kids at school that have no help with homework or even a hot meal outside of what school provides.  There are kids whose parents in the name of work have completely left them to the care of others and stay at home moms whom never let their kids see the light of day.  But for most of us, we are berating our fellow moms for things that just don't matter.
I watch and hear it all the time.  The mom that sits in the cheer parking lot during a closed practice "just in case"  That's fine as long as she doesn't make other moms feel bad for not doing the same thing.  I once threatened to wear a shirt to practice saying "I was at home all day, where were you?"  My balance has me at home all day,but I use practice time to run errands.  If you worked all day, but want to be with your child at practice, can't we agree that both of us are supporting our child and this is not bad parenting?  What about food??  I really try to feed my kids healthy food, but I have one that never eats protein.  If the best I can do that day is reece cups with 5 grams of protein each, please accept you have no idea what we deal with instead of commenting on candy for lunch.  In exchange, I promise to keep my thoughts on blue applesauce and orange cheetos to myself. How about a peace treaty?
Let's agree that there really are some bad parents out there.  And we need to call them on it.  We need to get those kids some help.  Let's agree that safety is a valid reason to speak up. How about we trust that parents know their own children and can make the best choices for their individual child (and it may not be what's best for yours). Let's agree that making a different choice for my child does not mean your choice is wrong. Let's agree it is okay to teach our kids our family values even if they disagree with yours.  And then lets agree to stop flaming those around us for making different amoral choices.
I am sure I have plenty of guilt to share here, but I am declaring a truce.  It is time to call the truly bad parents what they are but for most of the world, please let us keep our guilt on ourselves and give everyone else a break.  Time to douse the flames and end the war.